How to be Happy Now and for Ever?

Everyone experiences an unhappy mood sometime, but a  few are unhappy most of the time. Those who live a habitually unhappy life  probably do not where to look for happiness. Everyone wants to be happy, but few know what happiness really is.  Following incident is simplest remedy for the problem.

Once a group of a small group of people was attending a seminar. Suddenly the speaker stopped talking and started giving each one a balloon. He asked each one to write his/her name on it using a marker pen. Then all the balloons were collected and put in another room.

Learn to Search needle in a husk

He came on dais and asked the participants to go to the room where balloons were kept and asked to find the balloon which had their name written, within 5 minutes. Everyone was frantically searching for their name, colliding with each other, pushing around others and there was utter chaos.

At the end of 5 minutes hardly one or two could find their own balloon.  So many were muttering what a foolish task they did.

Speaker then asked each one to randomly collect a balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it. In less than five minutes everyone had their own balloon in hand and a smile on the face.

The speaker began--- Exactly this is happening in our lives. Everyone is frantically looking for happiness all around, not knowing where it is.

Our happiness lies in the happiness of other people. Give them their happiness, you will get your own happiness.

And this is the purpose of human life. Helping others is not only good for them and a good thing to do, it also makes us happier and healthier too. Giving also connects us to others. It builds a happier society for everyone.

Giving is  not all about money - we can also give our time, ideas and energy.  The true Art in Giving is to give from the heart without any expectation of a return. True giving comes from the same place inside you as your deepest happiness, that is why selfless giving gives deepest pleasure.

Other Posts :

A Guide to-better Life

Story of an Arrogant Doctor

Nine practical ways to Stop Thinking Negative

Journey in a Train.

People you need Around

Five undeniable Facts of Life

1.   Don't educate your children to be rich.

Educate them to be Happy. So when they grow up, they will  know the value of things, not the price.

2. Best awarded words in London.
"Eat your food as your medicines.
Otherwise you have to eat medicines as your food"

3. The one who loves you will never leave you because even if there are 100 reasons to give up, he will find one reason to hold on.

4. There is a lot of difference between human being and being human. A Few understand it.

5. U r loved when you are born.

  You will be loved when you die.

In between u have to manage...!

People You Need Around

Nothing incredible is accomplished alone. So we  need people in our  life. What type  of people we should keep around?

"In Life you will realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.

Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.

But the most important are the ones who bring out the best in you, respect you and accept you for who you are.

Those are the ones worth keeping around."

Dough on Sil : Keep Doing Good

A woman baked bread for members of her family and an extra one for a hungry passerby.

She kept the extra bread on the Window-sill, for whosoever would take it away.

Every day, a hunch-back came and took away the bread. Instead of expressing gratitude, he muttered the following words as he went his way: "The evil you do remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

This went on, day after day. Every day, the hunch-back came, picked up the bread and uttered the words: "The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

The woman felt irritated. "Not a word of gratitude," she said to herself... "Everyday this hunch-back utters this jingle! What does he mean?

One day, out of desperation, she decided to do away with him. "I shall get rid of this hunch-back," she said.

And what did she do? She added poison to the bread she prepared for him! As she was about to place it on the window sill, her hands trembled. "What is this I am doing?" she said.

Immediately she threw the bread into the fire, prepared another one and kept it on the window-sill.

As usual, the hunch-back came, picked up the bread and muttered the words:

"The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

The hunch-back proceeded on his way, blissfully unaware of the war raging in the mind of the woman. Everyday, as the woman placed the bread on the window-sill, she offered a prayer for her son who had gone to a distant place to seek his fortune. For many months, she had no news of him.. She prayed for his safe return.

That evening, there was a knock on the door. As she opened it, she was surprised to find her son standing in the doorway.. He had grown thin and lean. His garments were tattered and torn. He was hungry, starved and weak. As he saw his mother, he said, "Mom, it's a miracle I'm here. While I was but a mile away, I was so hungry that I collapsed. I would have died, but just then an old hunch-back passed by. I begged of him for a small part of his food, and he was kind enough to give me a whole bread. "As he gave it to me, he said, "This is what I eat everyday: today, I shall give it to you, for your need is greater than mine!"

"As the mother heard those words, her face turned pale and red. She leaned against the door for support. She remembered the poisoned bread that she had made that morning. Had she not burnt it in the fire, it would have been eaten by her own son, and he would have lost his life!

It was then that she realized the significance of the words: "The evil you do remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

Do good and; Don't ever stop doing good, even if it's not appreciated at that time.

The above story was mailed by Mr Praveen and forwarded by Major Haresh.

Other Posts :

Nine Practical Ways to Stop Thinking Negative

A Guide to Better Life.

Don't be a Slave of Habits

Arrogant Doctor

Arrogant Doctor

A mother in India used to call his son in UK daily reminding him to send a few more pounds so that she could do some shopping or go around in clubs with her friends. The son normally would reply, " I am trying would send as soon as possible."

The mother would yell, " You selfish!  you have forgotten how much pain we have taken to send you to the UK and now you are not helping us.  Had  we invested same amount in Bank I could fulfil all my dreams".

The  boy got tired with the monotonous daily conversation. He was sad. One day he forwarded a  story to his father requesting to read at night together with his mother.  The story goes ....

The doctor was called one evening for an urgent surgery. He answered the call, changed his clothes, reached hospital in minutes & went directly to the surgery block. He found the boy's father waiting, in the hall for the doctor.

On seeing him, the dad yelled: "Why did U take all this time to come?  Don't you know that my son's life is in danger? Don't you have any sense of responsibility?.. ."

The doctor smiled & said: "I am sorry, I wasn't in the hospital & I came as fast as I could after receiving the call...... And now, I wish you would calm down so that I can do my work"

"Calm down?! What if your son was in this room right now, would you calm down? If your own son dies now what will you do??" said the father angrily.

The doctor smiled again & replied: Doctors cannot prolong lives. Go & intercede for your son, we will do our best by God's grace.

"Giving advises when we are not concerned is so easy" murmured the father.

The surgery took some hours after which the doctor went out happy, “Thank goodness! Your son is saved!" And without waiting for the father's reply he carried on his way running. "If you have any question, ask the nurse!!"

"Why is he so arrogant? He couldn't wait some minutes so that I ask about my son's state" commented the father when seeing the nurse minutes after the doctor left.

The nurse answered, tears coming down her face: "His son died yesterday in a road accident, he was in the burial when we called him for your son's surgery. And now that he saved your son's life, he left running to finish his son's burial.

MORAL:

Never judge anyone, Because you never know how their life is & what they're going through..

More  Postings ...   

Let them learn Appreciation too

Nine practical ways to stop Negative thinking.

Story of Ant and Grasshopper

Nine Practical Ways to Stop Thinking Negative Thoughts

Even the most optimistic people are not immune to occasional negative thoughts. We all have to deal with moments when our problems seem too big, our pain too strong and our future too gloomy to look forward to. But the great thing is that as these moments pass and we learn that “Everything has a happy end, and if it is not happy, it is not the end”.

But until we realize that the situation that we considered the most difficult and problematic, actually turned out to be exactly the situation that changed (and improved) our life the most, we need to learn how to deal with destructive emotions on a day-to-day basis and stop the flow of negativity.

1. Don’t Cherish Negative Thoughts

This is a strange statement – how can anyone cherish negative thoughts? Yet I bet that you know a couple people, who cling on to their problems and misfortunes and take strange satisfaction in telling everyone how miserable they are. Usually these people are not looking for solutions, only for empathy.

Although, even those of us with an optimistic outlook on life sometimes refuse to let go of negative thoughts or emotions, because we feel that our pride has been injured or because we believe that we have been treated unjustly. We let these thoughts go round and round in our mind, contemplating vindictive scenarios and coming up with new derogatory remarks. The question is – who are we helping with these thoughts? No one. Who are we hurting? Mostly ourselves.

2. Being Happy or Being Miserable?

A negative mindset is not an inherited quality. It is a choice. While we hold on to our own destructive emotions and thoughts, nobody else will be able to help us. We need to understand that we can start making conscious choices to stop thinking negative thoughts by cultivating inner peace, happiness and a feeling of gratitude.

3. Don’t Accept Negativity from Other People

Wherever we live, we will always meet people who criticize, gossip and are focused on finding negative in every person and every situation. But there is no reason why we have to ascribe to their view of the world. If we know we can not change the way they think, we can always choose not to be part of the conversation.

4. Look for a Positive Explanation

When someone is rude to us, we automatically attribute negative qualities to this person. Our thoughts do not go beyond this point. A cashier was not polite to us – she is a terrible person. A Porsche cuts in front of us – the driver must be an arrogant idiot. Kids are running around the restaurant – they must be spoiled brats or their parents must not care enough to educate them well.

I am sometimes guilty of making these assumptions too. But then I stop myself and look for a different explanation and I am often reminded how erroneous snap judgments may be.

The cashier may be rude to me, because she has worked 10 hours without a break. The driver may have cut in front of me, because there is serious emergency. Kids may be running around because they are tired of sitting. Is it really that bad if they are enjoying themselves?

When you look for a positive explanation to people’s negative actions it becomes very easy not to get offended and to deal with frustration. And most importantly, it helps you to avoid feelings of embarrassment and guilt, because you have judged someone unjustly.

5. Smile

Just because it seems too simple, it does not mean that the power of a smile and laughter should be diminished. It not only helps to trigger positive emotions, but also changes the way we present ourselves to the world. It is another conscious choice that we can make in our quest to stop thinking negative thoughts.

6. For Every Negative Thought Think 3 Positive

Neutralize the effect of negativity by balancing every negative thought with three positive ones. Not only will doing this stop the flow of negative thoughts, but it also helps us to regain clarity and optimism.

7. Take Care of Your Self-Image

Negative thoughts are not always triggered by other people or outside events. Often we direct them inwardly and become our own worst critique. Instead of cultivating a sense of self-worth and self-respect, we worry excessively over minor issues that can not even be called ‘faults’.

Healthy self-esteem and self-respect has nothing to do with arrogance or pride. It is something that allows us to maintain a more positive outlook on life and welcome feedback from other people.

8. Learn from Your Children!

Children have an amazing ability to cope with pain and negative emotions. I see it with my 5-year-old niece all the time.

A few days ago, she got scratched by her cat. There was only so much the poor animal could handle. And 15 minutes of playing the ‘baby’, while being wrapped in blankets and groomed with a Barbie brush did it for him. Fighting for his freedom, he accidentally scratched Veronica’s hand and of course, crying followed 2 seconds later. But it ended just as quickly, because let’s face it – the task of looking out of the window for an imaginary parrot and a monkey was a lot more fun than getting offended or dwelling on the pain.

If as adults, we could get into our mind that it does not make sense to dwell on negativity, when there are so many wonderful things happening around us, we would be much happier and much more fun to be with. Which brings us to the next point…

9. Distract Yourself

In the moment when you feel strong negative emotions, analyzing or trying to suppress them does very little good. What I found to be effective is a fun distraction or a positive activity, which directs thoughts away from the source of irritation and often makes us forget why we were mad or upset in the first place.

This is sent by Mr Brijesh Diwakar by mail.

Let them learn Appreciation

One young academically excellent person went to apply for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV that the youth's academic achievements were excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never had a year when he did not score.

The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarships in school?". The youth answered "none".

The director asked, "Was it your father who paid for your school fees?" The youth answered, "My father passed away when I was one year old, it was my mother who paid for my school fees.

The director asked, "Where did your mother work?".  The youth answered, "My mother worked as clothes cleaner.

The director requested the youth to show his hands. The youth showed a pair of hands that were smooth and perfect. The director asked, " Have you ever helped your mother wash the clothes before?".

 The youth answered, "Never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books. Furthermore, my mother can wash clothes faster than me."

The director said, "I have a request. When you go back today, go and clean your mother's hands, and then see me tomorrow morning.”

The youth felt that his chance of landing the job was high. When he went back, he happily requested his mother to let him clean her hands. His mother felt strange, happy but with mixed feelings, she showed her hands to the kid. The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly. His tear fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful hat his mother shivered when they were cleaned with water.

This was the first time the youth realized that it was this pair of hands that washed the clothes everyday to enable him to pay the school fee. The bruises in the mother's hands were the price that the mother had to pay for his graduation, academic excellence and his future. After finishing the cleaning of his mother hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother. That night, mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office. The Director noticed the tears in the youth's eyes, asked: "Can you tell me what have you done and learned yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hand, and also finished cleaning all the remaining clothes'. The Director asked, "Please tell me your feelings."

The youth said, “Number 1, I know now what is appreciation. Without my mother, there would not be the successful me today. Number 2, by working together and helping my mother, only I now realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done. Number 3, I have come to appreciate the importance and value of family relationship. “

The director said, "This is what I am looking for, to be my manager. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the sufferings of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life. You are hired."

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates. Every employee worked diligently and as a team. The company's performance improved tremendously.

A child, who has been protected and habitually given whatever he wanted, would develop "entitlement mentality" and would always put him first. He would be ignorant of his parent's efforts. When he starts work, he assumes that every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the sufferings of his employees and would always blame others. For this kind of people, who may be good academically, may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel sense of achievement. He will grumble and be full of hatred and fight for more. If we are this kind of protective parents, are we really showing love or are we destroying the kid instead?

You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn piano, watch a big screen TV. But when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it. After a meal, let them wash their plates and bowls together with their brothers and sisters. It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love them in a right way. You want them to understand, no matter how rich their parents are, one day their hair will grow gray, same as the mother of that young person. The most important thing is your kid learns how to appreciate the effort and experience the difficulty and learns the ability to work with others to get things done.